Give to My Cute Kitties PAC

 

I get a lot of phone calls wanting me to give to Firefighters-PAC, or CuteDoggyPAC, or StarvingChildrenPAC. Ok, I like Firefighters and Puppies and want to help them.

But, I made the mistake of Googling what the PAC stands for, and it’s not good. It basically means that I have NOT been giving my hard-earned monopoly money to Charities for cute puppies. I have been giving it to Political Action Committees. PACs. [1] What the hell is a PAC you might ask?

Google it. Ask bard.google.com, and it gets worse. One AI told me,

“PACs are less accountable and transparent than charities because they are not subject to the same level of oversight. This means that PACs are more likely to engage in activities that are not in the public interest.”

Great. Not only did I not help any puppies, but my money may have been used against the public interest. A sort of Anti-Charity, disguised as a charity.

But this rabbit hole gets deeper. There are also Scam-PACs [2] that “gather money for a candidate or cause and then pocket the cash instead of giving it to the cause or the candidate.”

I’m fairly sure that is illegal. But if not, maybe I should start a PAC to help all of those stray cats that we keep adopting. I could call it the “Rescue Poor Kitties PAC”.

Ring. Ring. Ring.

“Mr Smith?”

“Yes.”

“Hi, we are from the Rescue Poor Kitties PAhemmmhemm, and We are collecting money to elect more people who help kitties, not those haters in office now.”

“What? Oh kitties? Well, yes. Great idea! Let’s get you some money then!” …. “So, did you say PAC? What the hell is a PAC anyway?”

 

[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Political_action_committee

[2] https://www.brennancenter.org/our-work/analysis-opinion/beware-scam-pacs-and-pacs-scam